Even as I type the first paragraph I have this crippling anxiety sitting on my chest which is really hard to describe. On one hand… I want it on record somewhere to say ‘this is who you think I am’ and ‘here’s a true thing about me tha”t you’d never know if I didn’t tell you’. On the other hand I know that people I care about are going to read it and worry that I’m about to hang myself from the nearest tree and be sad themselves. It is an uncomfortable vicious circle worrying that your sadness may make other people sad. – James Gunn
This is from the blog The Art Of Being Always Right (in Pursuit of Crappyness) by one of my fave writers James Gunn. In March, he somehow had the courage to not only write, but publish it for all his friends and family to see on Facebook. #Inspiration
I’m sharing it because it’s powerful. It’s unpretentious. It’s poignant. Mental ‘disorders’ are nothing to be ashamed of since we are all going to ‘meet it’ directly or indirectly at some point, the bias and stigma nonesense against it is what’s really shameful. #KMT
James is also one of the most audaciously hilarious peeps I know so when I came across ‘I Wish I Had Cancer’, I was stone. cold. moved with enlightenment. There is warmness in its pain and the structure and narrative puts you inside his head. As a writer, it’s #Goals
This is not going to be an X-Factor sob story… We all have our battles, we all have our secrets and we all have something that we hide from the world because it’s too painful to share it with them. I’m sharing this little bit of me with you because my head is full of fear, anger, misery, paranoia and truth. I’m putting the thoughts down here to empty my head of them so there’s more space for something better. And yes, I did say truth, it’s an ache in my every second of life and it has become debilitating and infuriating and it is a tumour in my soul that is making me weak –James Gunn
It’s really good to see a dude talk ’bout it- especially as it is a condition predominant in males and the cause of death (suicide) in boys/men under 45. When I think about it, I can actually understand why, and it indirectly reminds me how strong women truly are- and not by choice.
To get some understanding of why somebody could genuinely wish they had cancer, read the article:
And if you’re having problems with any type of mental issues that are weighing you down or just want to find out more, relax that stiff upper lip and look into these- whatever you do, talk about it- to a friend, a priest, a dog…or a Samaritan!
Homie, you can even write to me!! #WhyNot
Anybody can get a chemical in-balance anytime, and let’s be fair, (keepin’ it local) with things like the Brexit bullshit, election scapegoating, anti-social media, ‘affordable homes’ you can’t afford unless you want to live in Timbuktu, daylight- robbery rents, having two side-jobs to cover the poorly-paid main job that looks good on the CV, having to wait years to get that promotion from that crappy main job since everybody’s scared to move on or just motivated by the holy grail of redundancy packages, the NHS still being the elephant in the room, soul/ skin food being contaminated with poisons from a lab, 14 days of summer in every 365 days, Brixton turning into a middle-class Disneyland for the over 30’s, Br-Angelina splitting up, Kim-ye not splitting up, Banksy f’cking off, Mail Online… it’s very very easy to slowly or suddenly get overly overwhelmed and lose ‘you‘.
And that’s fine.
The sooner you can get it the sooner you can be the ‘you’ you want to be, innit?!
Ok back to James before I roll out, someone this talented and raw is gonna be famous to the point where you wouldn’t be able to look him in da eye fam! So keep an eye on him 😉 #JustSaying
Oh and ladies, don’t be shy…do all rush at once, he’s single and ready to tingle!
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